Didn't See That Coming..

Lily picked a new CD in the car this morning. She picked one because it had purple on it, so it looked "pfitty" (pretty with an f instead of an r for those struggling to read that).. because it was "da same as yoo coat, Mummy!"
We listened to a couple songs on the drive to school, then I asked her what she thought.

I have heard opera described as many things, but that's the first time I've heard it called "Cute!"

PRDK.. yes, love....

Lily has had an... emotional.. couple of days. I know a lot of children get upset at school time drop off, clinging to parents, tears, some might run, or refuse to go in, screaming can follow a parent down the hall from the classroom and still manage to break their heart at the gate. Two weeks of being in the family unit takes its toll, and of course in some ways they don't want to leave that security, that warmth and love and fun. I understand that.

The last couple of mornings I found myself wishing it was for those reasons my own little minion of unpredictability was causing chaos..

Morning 1 - The tables had moved
Morning 2 - Didn't want "Catty" to go home (cuddly toy)

I shall just assume that in her mind, some Lily bridge makes the gap from tables/toy to home with us and the wonderful times we've had over the last couple weeks. That she actually means she's missing us, but can't articulate it yet.... That's right, Mummy, that's EXACTLY what she means.

Also, she came out this afternoon in high spirits, holding a rainbow triangle and looking pleased with herself..

L: "I got somefin tell yoo, Mummy!"
M: " Oh really? That's a lovely rainbow!"
L: "No it not fat! I got tell yoo somefin!"
M:" Okay...."
L: "I not Lily anymore. I got a noo name. You know what my noo name is?"
M: *insert blank pleading look here*
L:"My name is Princess Rainbowdash da King, my name is. Yoo know now. Yoo call me?"
M: "Princess Rainbowdash....the King?"
L: "Dats wite, yoo know dis!"

*en route to car a confuddlement hits Mummy, the fact that it took her this long to suss what was bugging her is saying something*

M: "Lily, King is a boy thing, do you mean Queen?"
L: "What?"
M: "Well, you're a girl.. would it be Princess Rainbowdash the Queen?"

*Cue Lily looking very troubled and thinking very very hard while Mummy loads up the car and gets us home.. dinner is had, Superman is watched, games are played, all is well. Then comes bedtime.. Lily actually took care of bedtime by herself, no Mummy help, at goodnight moment Mummy gets an extra big hug, and as she's about to close the door...*

L: "Mummy...?"
M: "Yes, lovey?"
L: "Queen is too hard to say. I be Princess Rainbowdash da King."

By that point I'd forgotten the earlier conversation, so I just agreed. It was only once I'd got downstairs and pondered it all that it hit me. My girl takes a while sometimes, but she always gets there in the end.

Through Good and Bad

I thought I'd better update now before so much happens we have a novel instead of a blog. The adventures have continued, I'm amazed how much can fit into 4 days. Technically 3, I'm pretty sure Friday was a Mummy On Strike day. Normal things happened, of course, we just didn't go anywhere.

At least, I think we didn't... It's got to that point where days have blurred and I've actually lost Friday. Though the more I try to recall the more I think we DID something.. I just can't remember what.

(I hope I'm not the only person this happens to!)

Anyway, Saturday was spent roaming beautiful gardens of a mansion ("Castle, Mummy. It a Castle"), hunting out eggs of the mini chocolate variety. This part was fantastic! Very nicely done! Lily was an expert egg-hunter, and was very good about putting eggs in Pixie's bag too.
She won a book on the tombola, ate 2 hotdogs, got a giant green "Loon" and on her second attempt (and coaxing to stand closer by helpers) won a "CoNut" on the shy.
She was a little upset at not being able to have her face painted (Mummy had stood in the queue for almost an hour and it had moved all of 2 kiddies, and Lily was causing chaos with her Loon), but agreed to come away when bribed with Minecraft.
 Mummy had to stop at the shop for milk and drink, and all was well, so I thought "Hey, I can be in and out of there quick, I'll leave kiddies with carer and mad dash it" (not exactly dashing.. more a brisk thing)

Silly, silly Mummy.

I wasn't long, truly I wasn't, though when I got back, carer was looking really shaken. I could hear Lily screaming, and the moment I opened the driver door she bolted. Shouting for her to stop made no difference, but thank goodness when I shouted for someone to stop her, another Mummy came to the rescue, and got to Lily before she could reach the road.
One of those scary, watching it all unfold in slow motion moments. Times like that I truly curse my currently being unable to run.
Don't get me wrong, I'm very grateful that I've come so far, from being unable to walk across a room without crutches, and that was just a year ago...
But when times like this happen, it leaves me feeling utterly useless.

Apparently, while I was grabbing things, the carer had been having a hellish time. She had never seen that side of Lily, at least not that bad. Lily had completely lost it the moment Mummy was out of sight. Pulled the carer's hair, scratched her, pinched her, bitten her, threatened to "cut her up", thrown her weight around. The whole time screaming. It's a wonder she was brave enough to return today, albeit warily.
Of course had I known this was going to happen I would have taken her in with me, there was no build up to it, no warning. Straight into top level.
Once I was back, it was all over in about 10 minutes, and, in a way, it's good to know Lily doesn't just do that to me.

That was just Saturday's adventure! Onto Happier moments!!

Sunday was, of course, day of more chocolate eggs than a mini human should ever consume in a short space of time. It was really a lovely day. Granny and Grandad even came to visit close to bed time, and did the fun thing all Grannies and Grandads can (and indeed should!) do at such a time.. wind kiddies up to point of no return then leave Mummy with the aftermath (a tradition I shall continue with pride when I'm a Granny, I'm sure!), it was lots of fun, and full of moments that make your heart smile. Like Lily running to give Grandad a cuddle when he arrived (it can be quite hard to get her to say hello sometimes), and constantly giving us all mini eggs, because "I Sharing, Mummy". Just lovely!



Then, despite Mummy struggling to move on waking this morning, and deciding that today would be a Strike Day, we somehow ended up at the Zoo. Lily and Phillip  really enjoyed themselves! Animals were seen, pointed at, "oohed" and "aaahed" at. Lily stayed close to Mummy, even at the cafe, when Mummy crossed the room for cutlery Lily followed ("I meed to, Mummy. I keep you safe!"), and again mid-meal when we ran out of ketchup, and when Mummy ordered more because she was still hungry. (I ate more than the average person... by quite a lot... and still helped Lily finish hers, I guess I know where they get their appetites from).

Souvenirs were bought, and "Fairy Music", for the car.
 2 minutes into the journey home they were both absolutely fast asleep, ahhhh peace, how I missed you.

There's only one day of holiday left, and it's a big one. Homework, Hair wash, Bath.

Wish me Luck!

Well, that was a long one.

A lot has happened since the last post. We've had Mummy's birthday.. in which Granny came to stay and Mummy actually had a full night off. It was used wisely. A pub was visited with lovely peoples,  drinks were had, pool was played, and conversation inevitably turned to our children.. because, lets face it, they're what we do 24/7.. at least it's my purpose in life at the moment, there is very rarely room for anything else. I had a lovely time, it was a surreal experience to be out of an evening for the 3rd time this year, which is a lot for me these days!

We did The Hairwash. A long running tradition of turmoil in our house. This time, instead of dragging it out and going through the hours of battling, Mummy cheated. We went to the Hairdresser. She had to put 4 cushions, a bunch of folded towels, and a load of magazines on the chair, but low and behold Lily reached the Sink. (and she was relieved there was no Cup.. a fact the lady had to keep reassuring her of..  despite us not having used Cup in about 7 months)
Mummy had to hold Lily, Lily had to hold Cat,  Mummy had to be touching Cat's Tail. It was like a mini circle of safety. This was quite possibly the least stressful hair wash we've ever encountered. Gosh knows why I didnt brave her with HairDressers before.. I probably closed my mind to it with "the noise, the smells the etc etc etc" checklist of things I know she struggles with so I avoid. It's silly of me, I know, and I realised that yet again that day, so since then we've been on a few more adventures.

There was the Long Shop, so named because we can listen to almost a whole CD on the drive there, Lily decided she was going to get the Billy Bear all herself. She was going to get Ten. "Ten Billy Bear, Mummy, You stand me? I go all Myself" was the phrase of the journey, over, and over, and over... you get the drift.
We arrived, the car was dropped off at the valet (I felt sorry for them, it was a state...), copious toys were oohed and ahhed at. Lily picked up a Spiderman shirt, and some exceedingly bright trousers which, so far, Mummy has lost the battle to remove. I may have to pull out the Marvel shirt to trade to wash that one...
 We got to the point of Billy Bear gettage, and Lily dutifully joined the queue... only she doesnt have a very good track record of staying still.. so although she stayed where the queue was, she moved around so much she was consistently at the back of it. Then during a lull where there was no one else to serve, she was ignored. Both people behind the counter had acknowledged her prescence, and mine, albeit from a distance (I was keeping an eye from across the aisle, doing the "I'm really interested in this frozen food thing, Lily, I'm not checking up on you" routine). Soon more arrived and they were served and I got impatient.
I probably appeared rude when I interrupted the lady ordering to ask the staff if there was any reason my daughter had been standing there, waiting patiently for so long and been completely ignored. They said they hadnt seen her, yet they had both said hello. Next time perhaps we should give her a sign. I certainly understand why they may have put off serving her, but perhaps telling me she was invisible wasn't the most tactful way to go about it.
Other than Mummy having a Moment, that trip went rather well. I even managed to pick her up a birthday present... (likely one of many, I do tend to go a -little- O.T.T)

Then there was Bewilderwood. That was a huge success! Cedric the Easter Bunny gave Lily 3 mini eggs, she had her face painted with green and whiskers. She made some very creative bunny ears and a tail. She spent hours looking for Twiggles (and bless her, getting quite upset when there were none to be found.. Mummy tried to say they were shy, so she spent a while singing to the trees to get them to appear and know she was a friend.)
She even got on a stage with lots of other minions and did the Bewilderwood Party Dance. (which resulted in some lovely pictures to embarrass her with when she's a teenager).
When we got home the first blowout of the holiday really hit. I cant remember now what set her off, she was tired though, and probably overstimulated from the days adventure. The kicking, the biting, throwing, screaming, limbs in all directions confusion enveloped us. It lasted about an hour before we were able to get to a point she could bring herself down from it.

Then there was the Noise in the Sofa. I'm pretty sure it's Granny's phone, but it was buzzing away in there on and off for a bout 3 minutes, the noise drove Lily insane, things ended up everywhere. (which was partly mummy's fault, trying to pull the sofa apart to stop it).  It's still in there, and taunts us. (Darn you!)

Today, we went on an Easter Trail. We walked around a woodland nature trail (Mummy was very uncomfortable and achy before we got anywhere this morning, now there are quite a few choice words that spring to mind). It took about 2 hours, the end of which included a white bunny handing out chocolates. It was really well done, the weather was lovely, and Lily seemed to enjoy it, once again until we got home. We'd had lunch, all was well, a few teary moments, nothing major. Minecraft was being played, and then Phillip dared to touch the Remote.

Which promptly brought up a menu in the middle of the screen.

Unfortunately instead of calmly coming and telling Mummy, Lily hit him with the remote and went into meltdown mode. (thankfully it wasn't hard so he was more shocked than actually hurt)
When, about 2 and a half hours later the gardener arrived, Mummy was still clearing up the aftermath, Lily was saying sorry and giving her little brother cuddles, and Granny arrived soon after to two very happy kiddies that showed no signs of anything happening, and a Mummy who seemed to be inexplicably pulling her hair out. (not literally. I have Phillip to do that for me)

I know why it's happening at the moment. I also know it's going to get worse and more frequent. The school routine is lost, and when it comes back it'll need to be re-established. Then the House will Change and Be "Diffent". I know we'll get there, but it's going to be a tough couple of months.

I've been writing so many positive things about Lily, that to write about the not-so good seems harsh. I know all children do these things, she just does them with a little more.. flare I guess. That's not the right way to describe it, at all, but it's the best my tired brain can manage this evening.

In the meantime, tomorrow is Good Friday... and Mummy is going to refuse to go anywhere. Perhaps Lily can Minecraft a city for Spiderman. Perhaps we'll see if she can do 100 bounces on the trampoline. Perhaps we'll be able to get through a day without Phillip changing all the settings on the washing machine.
The possibilities are endless.

The Man

My lass can be a strange bessom at times. Like many she's not quite sure of how to behave in social situations, so tends to opt for "other" and withdraw into herself. If she's overwhelmed (either by good or bad) she sometimes shows a lack of reaction. Something like this happened today.

Lily wanted to see "The Man" again. The amazing Man in The Shop. The one who knows Spiderman. She was sure he'd be able to give her real powers. That her surprise would be a costume with real super powers so she can meet Spiderman's Friends after her birthday.

(For those that read older posts I realise this is repeating myself... but Lily does tend to repeat.. lots...)

Since Saturday "The Man" is Lily's hero. Not like a Spiderman hero, but he's "The Man".. which is a level of heroism in itself.. at least I think so, it's hard to 'get' Lily sometimes.

So it was that midmorning came, and Mummy had given into the pleading. There was no way that Lily was going to wait a moment longer, and besides she wanted to play minecraft too, so we had to go now so she would have enough time for that later.

We arrive at the store, making the grand entrance (walked in and didnt take notice of The Man, you wouldn't believe she's been pestering Mummy all weekend to go back)... Checked shelves for Spiderman 3 ("No.. Still no fee Mummy"), while Mummy explained to The Man about Lily's real power theory, to which he chuckled and said to her that no, it's not a suit with powers... but....

Before I knew it her hands were full of all sorts of goodies, cushion, books, shirt, cartoons, toy, badge.. even a special poster.. so much she couldn't carry it. I was absolutely gobsmacked.. and Lily was just standing there... I knew she was silently imploding, overwhelmed by good things, smiling happily, saying thankyou.. I knew exactly how much she loved it all.. but I do wonder if The Man knew how much of an affect that had on her, or if she came across as.. not ungrateful or unimpressed.. but lacking in the reaction he hoped for somehow.

There Mummy stood, grinning like an idiot, and I must admit, overwhelmed by such amazing generosity..

There Lily stood, not quite making eye contact (perhaps she did, it's a little fuzzy now), clutching Spiderman things to her, saying thankyou.. I wonder if he saw past that to the excitement underneath. I hope so, I hope that he knows how much he brightened her day today.

The moment we got onto the high street, she was shouting "Has anyone got this toy? I got it FIRST! Him's MY Toy. You can't hab it!" to no one and everyone.

We picked a special frame so the poster can live in her room.. "They can keep after me, Mummy"

When we got home, she wanted to wear the shirt, that will easily fit her for the rest of her life, she cuddled up with Cushion, raaaahed Phillip with Toy, told Mummy off for reading her book, and started whizzing. Lily was a blur, how I managed to get her to sit still long enough for a photo is still a mystery to me.

Mummy really needs to read up on all the Heroes and Villains. Lily keeps asking who they all are, and other than the well known few, I have no clue. I'm sure at some point I knew more, perhaps having kiddies knocked old information out.. perhaps I can only remember so much at a time. But Lily wants to know.. so Mummy must find out. (Mummy shall consult the all-knowing Google)

In the meantime, Lily has now decided the shirt is a second skin. When bedtime came around it was made clear before Mummy even started the Jama Hunt, that it wasnt happening.

"I wear dis always, Mummy. No take it off. You not habbing it. It mine. I wear dis EVER" (serious look, pointy finger, making sure I definitely understood)

I can just picture her now, trying to get away with hiding it under her school uniform...

Superheroes

Imagine, for a moment, you work in a shop that sells DVDs, computers, consoles, games... lots of expensive things...
Now imagine some insane woman wheels in a pushchair, complete with chocolate covered infant (Mummy should have waited until after shopping trip was over before giving Pixie the "bikkit").
That would be daunting enough for anyone... but add a hyper looking child whizzing in circles and it was definitely a facepalm moment.

Having shown Lily the shelf of children's DVDs though, she settled down and inspected all the covers before picking out three colourful ones. Noticing it was 4 for £10 Mummy said she could have another.
Lily saw Spiderman 1 and 2, and began telling Mummy about them (it was from this same store she bought 1+2 last time). We couldnt see the 3rd one, so she dutifully went to ask for help.
Cue one very proud Mummy watching her walk up to the counter and asking very quietly. (then a little louder)

The man at the desk should get an award. He came and scanned the shelves, where no Spiderman 3 existed, much to Lily's disappointment. He pulled out instead a Marvel box set and tried to show her. Lily dropped to the floor protesting, it wasn't Him. She continued to protest as the man knelt on the floor next to her and started to tell her about them.
He told her their names, and their powers, but she couldnt hear him, she had turned her back, getting more and more upset. By this point Mummy would have given up, but not The Man (as Lily now calls him). He continued to calmly speak about how the same person that wrote about Spiderman also wrote about all these people. That they were Spiderman's friends.

That got Lily's attention. Over the next 10 minutes he re-told her their names and powers, by the end she was not only facing him, but leaning in, entranced, looking at pictures of one of his friends hugging Spiderman on his phone. Then he told us about an event where people dress up as heroes, and she might get to meet them.

Lily's very excited about that. All the way to the park she spoke about how she's going to meet Spiderman's friends after her birthday. How she wants to dress like a hero too so she can be his friend.
All around the park she was shouting for her new superhero friends to come play.. Mummy had to explain that they're probably off saving the world.

She's spoken about it a lot today too, and I honestly cannot wait. It's nice to see her so looking forward to something!

Lily enjoyed Fantastic 4 (she got sad when no one wanted to be The Things friend, "I'll be you fend! I luff you!"), and X-Men (she wanted to dress up like storm so she can make it snow).

In the meantime, Lily says all the outfits Mummy has found on the internet won't work because they "dont have real powers". She wants to go and see "The Man" again because he knows Spiderman and "maybe him can gib me real powers". So we're going back on Tuesday, we'll blow up that bridge when we get to it,  and who knows, maybe they'll have Spiderman 3 by then.

Assemblies and Good Times

Just when I think there couldn't possibly be room for any higher level of pride within me, something happens to kick it up yet another level!

Lets start with the Easter Assembly...
 My Lily, my beautiful Lily, who struggles with noise, and sometimes doesnt like to be touched, cannot sit still and has the attention span of... well.. Lily. Each time I have been to an assembly she's sat apart from everyone else, next to a teacher. One time I went she was sitting out of the hall on the steps outside the door and just listening in. In fact at the Harvest Assembly I had to go and coax her out from under a table...

Imagine my surprise, and utter joy to see her coming in with everyone else in her class, holding hands with a special friend of hers who she absolutely adores. She sat nicely with them, she sang beautifully, holding her fist in front of her mouth like she was on the Xfactor with a microphone. She really joined in, the dance moves were brilliant, and she bobbed to the beat. She scanned the audience until she found me and gave me the best smiles, truly enjoying it. I welled up. Words cannot express the emotions that got me during that assembly.
  Even Phillip was fascinated!

Apparently the special friend whos hand she held on the way in and out also sits with her in daily assemblies now, and when Lily starts to struggle, he gently takes her hand and strokes it, instantly calming her. I am so grateful to him for helping her to feel safe, secure and accepted.


Today Lily was on the "Super Sun" for excellent writing and and Maths.. another sticker for her chart, she's doing well. She had cooking club after school today, and did really well, she came out showing off her creations, chocolate cornflake nests! Mummy and Phillip were allowed one each, and Lily ate one in the car, and one for pudding. They were delicious! Phillip thoroughly enjoyed his... it always surprises me how far mini people can spread their food.
Of course this meant Lily retreated to her bedroom, door shut and demo mode on piano up loud, because Pixie was a mess. Once he'd had a bath she reappeared, able to handle the situation again.

There's a conversation Lily and I have about Phillip nearly every day. It's something I started to help her bond with him, there was a time she didnt want anything to do with him... then I started telling her he was MY Phillip and I was going to cuddle him first.. made a game of it and voila. Phillip is hers, she loves him..

We had the chat again today, always the same, always makes me laugh..

M: "He's MY Phillip"
L: "No. Him's MY Phillip!"
M: "Why is he your Phillip?"
L: "Because him LUFF me."
M: "Well, he loves me too.."
L: "..yes... but him luffs me LOTS mummy... him just luff you ONE."

The Disco

Wow, what a hectic weekend!

The disco upon us, Lily and Mummy set out an hour early (no power on this earth could make her wait any longer), by car (walking makes lily tired, though she can run and dance nonstop for most of the day.. where is the logic there?) which took all of 3 minutes. We had the honor of being first in the queue, and about 20 minutes later another excited mini person lined up behind us. From that point came the masses.

Lily clutched her ticket with pride, and used Mummy as a makeshift maypole. How she was still able to walk (run) straight when it was time to go in is a mystery to me.

All in all it was an absolutely fantastic event! Lily had a struggle to understand the boys v girls dance competition, meaning each had half the hall.  ("but I want to dance everywhere" she sobbed)
Once I explained it was how to win a "loon" though, in terms Lily could understand she perked up.

Another Lily moment when it came to snack time. Mini-er kiddies first, then year 1s. Took a few attempts to help her understand that one. The way in which things are explained is so important. It's a shame so much seems to be lost in translation.

At the start, Lily opted to sit far behind everyone else, alone, and certain Mummy wasnt allowed to sit with her. By the end, she was integrated to the point I struggled to find her when I scanned the crowd. Both a little daunting, and utterly aweinspiring.

She told a very proud Granny when we arrived home that she wasnt scared, because her "ears are fixed". That the loud noises didn't hurt.

If all that wasn't enough, she won the biggest balloon palm tree with a bear climbing it I've ever seen. It had to ride in the front seat in case it popped in the car, and now lives in a well chosen high place where Phillip cannot reach it.  (much to his frustration, he sits and squeaks at it)


I owe many many thanks to everyone who made The Disco possible. The amount of work that went into it was awe-inspiring. Everyone thoroughly enjoyed it, and Lily is already looking forward to the next one!